


The Morning After

by DaAmazingMeepers



Category: The Hobbit - All Media Types, The Hobbit - J. R. R. Tolkien
Genre: Alternate Universe - Coffee Shops & Cafés, Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, First Meetings, Fluff, M/M, SO MUCH FLUFF, Tumblr Prompt, Walk of shame AU, sexual activity mentioned
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-12-21
Updated: 2015-12-21
Packaged: 2018-05-08 03:50:49
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,491
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5482286
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/DaAmazingMeepers/pseuds/DaAmazingMeepers
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>The morning after an awkward sexual encounter, Bilbo Baggins meets someone who interests him far more than his one night stand did.</p><p>Based on the tumblr prompt: “We met each other on a Sunday morning, both doing our walk of shame” AU</p>
            </blockquote>





	The Morning After

It was a Saturday night, and Bilbo Baggins was feeling something rare for him: the need to get out of the house. No matter how long he sat at his computer brainstorming, the words he was searching for so desperately wouldn’t come to him. At last, he shut his laptop with a frustrated huff and set it aside, standing to walk to his room. If he was going to go out, he was going to go out in style, not baggy sweatpants and an old t-shirt.

It didn’t take him long to find a suitable outfit, if perhaps a bit too nice for where he was planning on going, with a brown vest over a red button-down shirt and khaki pants. He did a quick once-over of his hair and teeth, making sure they were presentable, and with a quick nod of approval at his reflection in the mirror, he slipped his shoes and jacket on and stepped out his door.

His neighbor, Hamfast Gamgee, was already outside as he was shutting the door. The older man was watering his plants, and he sent a cheerful smile to Bilbo. “Well, hello there, Mr. Bilbo!” he called in greeting. “Fine night to be out and about, isn’t it?”

Bilbo sent back a polite (if a bit stiff) smile. “Indeed it is,” he replied. “And it’s been a while since I’ve had a night out; I’m probably about due one.”

“Well, I hope you have a nice time,” Hamfast laughed with a tip of his hat. “I might be inclined to join you, but it’s my turn to make dinner tonight, and I wouldn’t want to upset the missus.”

 _'Good,'_ Bilbo thought. What he said was, “Have a nice night, Hamfast,” and he set off.

It was a fifteen minute walk to the Prancing Pony, a small pub on the edge of town, and quite popular with the locals. As it was the weekend, the place was practically packed, and Bilbo had to bob and weave to get to the bar. He ordered an ale and leaned on the counter, looking for any potential hookups.

Now, Bilbo was not one you would call ‘promiscuous’. His neighbors considered him polite, if a bit of a shut-in, and his relatives thought him respectable, if a bit odd for being unmarried well into his thirties. However, that didn’t mean he didn’t have his needs and desires, and with his friendly hazel eyes and charming grin, he could generally easily find someone who was interested in getting into bed with him without wanting the mess of committing. He was always discrete, and it was always enough to tide him over so he could go back to his books and vegetable garden for a while yet.

He had finished off his first drink and was nursing a second when he caught sight of her. Across the room was a tall, redheaded lady in a short, tight red dress that only seemed to accentuate how long her legs were, and he was immediately intrigued by her. When she met Bilbo’s eyes, he felt as though she was devouring him. She was the type of woman who Hamfast would call a ‘maneater’, and who his cousin Drogo would call ‘way out of every man’s league’.

Before he could even think about going up to talk to her, she was approaching him and Bilbo found himself in the rare position of frantically searching for something witty to say with no results. He was saved from saying something that would embarrass himself when she purred, “You like what you see?”

Bilbo gulped. He felt like a teenage boy again, blushing and stammering at the slightest bit of romantic attention given to him, but he wasn’t going to lie to a beautiful creature such as this. “I’d say so, yes,” he replied, hoping he didn’t sound as eager as he was feeling.

She eyed him up and down for a moment, and once again there was that feeling of being eaten alive. He held back a shiver. Then she downed the last of her drink and called the bartender over to pay her tab. When that was done, she turned back to him and ran a single fingertip down his jawline to rest on his chin. “Would you like to see more?”

His knees practically turned to jelly. “Absolutely,” he croaked.

––---

Once he had paid his own tab, she took his comparatively little hand in her well-manicured one and led him out of the pub. As it turned out, her house wasn’t so far from there; a quick three-minute walk. The moment the door to the house was closed behind them, she attacked his lips with a fierce determination pushing him toward what he assumed was the bedroom.

The actual sex lasted a surprisingly short time, and she took charge of the entire thing. Not that Bilbo was going to complain about being dominated by a gorgeous person. The things she could do with her voice alone made heat pool in his belly and an almost pornographic moan escape his lips. She took her pleasure, and as she did, made him fall apart. It didn’t take him long to fall asleep once they were finished, feeling utterly wrecked. 

He woke the next morning to the sound of the front door opening and the feeling of her sitting up abruptly. “Shit, my husband’s back,” she hissed. “You’ve got to get out.”

Bilbo blinked blearily at her, suddenly very awake. “Wait, husband?” he quietly demanded. “You didn’t say anything about there being a husband!”

“Well I didn’t need to when he wasn’t supposed to be back for another two days,” she retorted, “but now you have to leave.”

Acting mainly on instinct, Bilbo hurriedly put his pants, shirt and shoes on, grabbing the rest of his clothes as she shoved him out the window (thankfully on the first floor). He landed on the ground just as he heard a voice calling, “Honey? Are you still in bed?” from inside the house. His heart pounding, he hid beneath the windowsill as he listened to the woman coo at her husband and apparently lead him to another room. Once he was certain his departure wouldn’t be noticed, he sighed and began the walk back into town. 

Had he known she was married, he never would have slept with her. He had never liked the idea of being a home wrecker, nor did he like the idea of touching someone that wasn’t his to touch. He had a feeling the guilt of it all would stick with him for a while. He slipped his jacket on as he walked, and had just reached the Prancing Pony (which he would be avoiding for a while, he decided) when he realized that he had left his socks at the woman’s house.

God, he could use a good cup of tea.

There was a little cafe right across from the pub, and he decided to stop in to grab something to tide him over before he took the bus back to his place. He stepped in and settled himself on a stool at the counter, ordering a strong earl grey. He then took a look at himself in the mirror that was set next to the espresso machine and grimaced. Anyone with eyes would be able to see what he had been up to the night before.

He was tugged out of his thoughts of self-pity by someone dropping onto the stool next to his own and a rough voice saying, “Coffee. Black.”

Bilbo observed the man curiously. He was quite tall, much taller than Bilbo was, and his long dark hair was pulled back in a loose ponytail. His icy blue eyes sported dark circles under them, and his clothes were rather bedraggled, although it was clear that they were a good quality. The longer he looked at the stranger, the more he realized that they were on the same boat, and he couldn’t stop a quiet chuckle from escaping his lips.

Evidently, it hadn’t been quiet enough, as the stranger suddenly turned to him with a rather fearsome scowl. “Do you find something amusing?” he growled.

Blushing slightly, Bilbo sputtered a flustered explanation. “O-oh no, I wasn’t— I’m not laughing at you, I swear! I just thought it was ironic that we’re in such similar situations!”

For a moment, the man only stared at him, and Bilbo had the horrifying thought that he was wrong and this stranger was looking so disheveled for a completely different reason, and then Bilbo would have to avoid both the Prancing Pony and the cafe for the rest of his life. And then the stranger let out a sigh and some of the tension drained from his shoulders. He mustered a small, amused smile. “Is it that easy to tell?” he asked, his voice seeming to roll over Bilbo like an earthquake.

Bilbo grinned, feeling more at ease. “Only if you’re in the same boat, I suppose,” he answered, before turning more to face the stranger and holding his hand out to shake. “Bilbo Baggins, at your service.”

The man hesitated before shaking his hand. “Thorin Durin, at yours,” he replied, a smile small enough to be mostly hidden by his beard gracing his lips.

\-----

They moved to a small table once they had received their orders, Thorin immediately downing at least half of his coffee and hardly flinching at the temperature. “That bad, huh?” Bilbo commented. Normally he would have been too embarrassed to say such a thing, but he supposed it was different with a stranger.

Thorin huffed with a wry smile. “Unfortunately, it wasn’t so much the sex as it was the aftermath,” he explained. 

Bilbo winced. “What happened?” he inquired.

Thorin hesitated, seeming to consider the ramifications of telling personal matters to someone he had just met before speaking. “It was with…an old friend from University. We were at a party and were both drunk, and it sort of just happened.” He chuckled dryly. “When we woke up, the first thing he said to me was, ‘god, it had to be you of all people’. He didn’t say another word after that.”

Bilbo blinked in surprise. He wasn’t surprised about Thorin’s bed partner being a man; he had had his own dalliances with a bloke or two, although he tended to sleep with more women. He was, however, a little startled that the man seemed to have so much distain for Thorin. “And you were friends?” he asked curiously.

With a shrug, Thorin took another swig of his coffee. “Evidently he didn’t think so,” he muttered.

Bilbo sat back in his chair with a huff. “Well if he’s that rude then I would consider it a good thing that he didn’t want to associate with you,” he stated. “Now you don’t have to put up with his attitude.”

A smile returned to Thorin’s face, and Bilbo had to admit, it was a very nice smile. “I suppose that’s true,” he agreed. “He was always kind of a git anyway.”

“See?” Bilbo replied with a smile. “You’ll be much better off.”

Thorin raised an eyebrow at him over the rim of his mug. “And what about you?” he then questioned. “Clearly your time was similarly bad since you look like a truck ran you over.”

Bilbo might have protested such a rude description, but to be fair, he was a little right. He shrugged with a weary smile. “She failed to tell me until the morning after that she had a husband,” he said simply.

Thorin cringed. “Ah. And I don’t suppose he was aware of any of it?”

Bilbo scoffed. “Well, considering she seemed pretty eager to get me out of the house before he discovered I was there…”

“Not likely,” Thorin finished, shooting him a sympathetic look. “I’m sorry, that sounds like an even worse experience than mine.”

He looked so sincere in his sympathy that a warm feeling washed over Bilbo. “Yes, well,” he spoke, looking flustered, “I suppose it could have been worse.”

“Oh?” Thorin asked curiously.

Bilbo grinned. “He could have known and wanted to watch.”

The loud laugh that Thorin let out melted Bilbo’s insides into a big gooey puddle.

\-----

Their conversation then turned to chit chat about their lives. Bilbo learned that Thorin worked in the jewelry business and did metalsmithing as a hobby, and in return told him something of his writing and his garden. Thorin spoke of his extended family that he was very close to, whereas Bilbo brought up his own extended family that he couldn’t stand. It wasn’t until Thorin glanced at his watch and gave a murmur of surprise that either of them realized how long the two of them had been talking. “It’s already nearly one,” Thorin commented, moving to gather his things. “I should be going.”

“Oh,” Bilbo spoke, a feeling of vague dismay welling up in him. “Right, I suppose I should be getting back home as well.” He would have much rather continued to chat with Thorin, but of course he couldn’t expect the man to just free his schedule up for someone he had just met.

After Thorin had everything he needed and stood to leave, he paused just inside the door of the cafe and looked back to Bilbo. “It was nice talking to you,” he said with a smile. “I hope the rest of your day is better.”

Bilbo’s heart fluttered, and he returned the smile. “It already is,” he promised.

The other man’s icy eyes took on a significantly warmer tone, and then he was gone. Once he was out of sight, Bilbo leaned back in his chair with a sigh. He was inwardly cursing himself for not even bothering to ask to exchange contact information. The first decent conversation with someone he connected with in years, and he let that person slip through his fingers.

He finished off the last of his tea, now cold, and slipped his jacket on, stopping by the counter to pay and drop a couple bills in the tip jar before heading out for the walk back to his house. Hamfast wasn’t in his front yard when he arrived, for which he was grateful. He was a nice man, to be sure, but Bilbo wasn’t ready to deal with that level of nosiness just yet.

Once his front door was shut behind him, Bilbo let out a sigh and looked around him. It was a little chilly thanks to the heating having been left off all night, but still tolerable thanks to the spring sunshine coming through the windows. He toed off his shoes and hung up his jacket, adjusting the thermostat on his way to his study. While he had rather expected the whole ‘one night stand with a married woman’ thing to stifle his creativity, he instead found he was rather inspired to continue where he had left off the night before. Where the sudden need to write had come up, he couldn’t say, but he certainly wasn’t going to squander it.

And if thoughts of long dark hair and ice blue eyes with more warmth than anyone might expect from them floated through his head the whole time, he was far too busy writing to acknowledge them.

\-----

These thoughts niggled at Bilbo for days after that, popping up unexpectedly when he was going about his business. He found them very inconvenient, seeing as he had no way to find Thorin again except perhaps to stake out that cafe until Thorin came back to it, but there was no guarantee that he was a regular there, and besides that seemed like a somewhat creepy thing to do. No, it was better to just forget about him and move on.

It wasn’t until a week after the incident that Bilbo discovered that it wasn’t so impossible to find him after all. He was at the market and was searching through his pockets to find his grocery list only to pull a slightly crumpled napkin out instead. He was about to throw it in a bin nearby when dark ink caught his eye. His curiosity getting the best of him, he unfolded it. There was a note inside.

_I very much enjoyed our talk, and would love to get together for more of them, if you’re interested.  
Thorin (080) 555-4862_

For a few second, Bilbo could only stare at the note in shock. Then a small giggle bubbled out of him, growing until it had turned into almost hysterical laughter, which earned him a few uncomfortable glances from other shoppers. Thorin must have slipped the napkin into his pocket when he wasn’t looking. All this time he had the ability to get in contact with him and he hadn’t known! Oh dear, Thorin must have thought he wasn’t interested!

He considered waiting until he got home to put the number to use, but he knew he wouldn’t be able to wait that long. Saving the number, he then opened a new text message, pondering over what to send before finally settling on, _Is it too late to cash in that offer of another chat?_

He waited with baited breath, and a few seconds later his phone vibrated with a new message, which he opened immediately.

_Who is this?_

A feeling of disappointment filled Bilbo, although really he could hardly blame Thorin for not remembering who he was. He typed a quick response. _Bilbo Baggins. We met in the cafe across from the Prancing Pony a week ago. I only just found your number._

Biting his lip, he considered sending an additional apology, but halfway through composing it, he was already receiving a reply.

_Oh thank god, I thought I had been too forward and scared you off._

Bilbo let out a little laugh, a grin spreading across his face. _Not at all. In fact, I’ve been beating myself up for not asking for your contact information this whole time._

Content that the misunderstanding had been cleared up, he moved on to finish his shopping, finding his grocery list in the opposite pocket. He had only found a few of his items before his phone buzzed again.

_I suppose that’s my fault for not putting the note in a more obvious place. I just didn’t want you to miss it and leave without it if I put it on the table.  
Also I thought I was being sneaky._

Bilbo snorted, typing his response with one hand. _To be fair, I might have appreciated it more if I had actually bothered to put my hand in my pocket._

Oh how different things could have been. They could have been talking all this time, getting to know each other better. Of course, he supposed that didn’t really matter now that they had finally managed to get in touch with each other. 

The next response came as he was picking a couple cans of green beans off a shelf. _Well what do you say we give this another shot, then? Are you doing anything today?_

Bilbo’s heart beat faster. He was going to get to see Thorin again. He quickly typed up an answer. _I should be free. I just have to finish with the groceries right now._

It was then that the soft ding of a text alert in front of him caught his attention, and when he looked up, his jaw nearly dropped. Standing in front of him with a grocery basket hanging off his arm and a look of surprise that probably mirrored Bilbo’s own was Thorin. He was just as attractive as Bilbo remembered him.

For a moment, they could only stare at each other. Then Thorin scratched the back of his head, a somewhat sheepish grin on his face. “So, ah, it appears I’m also doing my shopping.”

The sentence sounded so awkward to Bilbo that it made him giggle. Soon enough, Thorin had joined him, and the two of them were standing in the middle of the aisle laughing away at the ridiculousness of the situation and attracting more uncomfortable looks from the other patrons.

Once the laughter had died down, Bilbo looked back up at Thorin, his eyes watering from how hard he had been laughing. “Goodness gracious, look at us,” he chortled. “What a mess we are.”

Thorin’s eyes still sparkled with his laughter. It was a good look on him. “Look at us indeed,” he replied. He adjusted the basket on his arm and then shot him a grin. “But I’m willing to give this another try if you are.”

Bilbo’s heart skipped a beat, the way Thorin was looking at him. He wasn’t sure exactly what these feelings were that this gorgeous man was filling him with, but he knew he wanted more of them.

“Yes,” he spoke with a nod, returning the grin. “I’d like that.”

**Author's Note:**

> Okay guys, this fic has been in the making for more than six months, so I really hope you all enjoy it! The moment I saw that AU prompt, I knew I had to write it for bagginshield. It gave me a lot of trouble, though; I think I've gotten too used to just writing RP responses, and I need to get back into the habit of actually writing.^^; It does please me greatly that everything evened out so that there's exactly 3500 words in the story, though. Let me know what you think!
> 
> (Also, the married lady that Bilbo slept with may or may not be fem!Smaug. Her husband is whoever you want him to be. And of course, the douchecanoe that Thorin slept with is Thrandy.)


End file.
